She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
Randomize