But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
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