I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
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Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
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the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.