More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"