i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
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