We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
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