I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
He literally asked permission to hit on me
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
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