well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
Randomize
