What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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