I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
i celebrated the independence of our country by dry heaving tequila all morning. so classy. happy 4th.
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize