i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
Oh. Im drinking alone in a banana costume. Every time youre feeling down, i want you to think of me right now and know that your life is better than mine.
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize