I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize