like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Randomize
