Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Randomize