With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
