We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize