Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
