Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
they're like a gay fantastic four
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
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