As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
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