Considering that my ex-wife dumped me to become a lesbian, the Universe owes me a threesome.
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
I TAUGHT HER CAT TO SIT. CATS DON'T FUCKING SIT ON COMMAND. BUT THIS ONE DID!
It's basically my crowning achievement.
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
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