How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
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