Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
It's like God shit irony all over that family
Too much gin, very little bucket
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
Randomize
