I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
