i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
he puts the penis in happiness.
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
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