How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
40s are totally the cure
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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