I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
Why is there bacon in the couch?
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
