Her vagina should come with caution tape.
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
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