East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
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