talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
Randomize
