i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
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