is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
Randomize
