MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
Randomize
