great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
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