So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Randomize
