last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
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