What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
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