she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
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