They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
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