i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
Randomize
