period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Randomize