i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Randomize
