Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
Randomize