it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize
