So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
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