You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
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