I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
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