What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
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