How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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