3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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