It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
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