No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize
