And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
Randomize